So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
