he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
