I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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