Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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