you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
