i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
birth control should be required to get into college
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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