id be glad to
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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