It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
