Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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