I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize