your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
