Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize