he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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