we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
