Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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