Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
