He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
