I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
