It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
how does that bad decision feel?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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