sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
