My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
