I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
