i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I just cut my nipple shaving
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
