it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Randomize
