bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
