There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize