And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
