The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Randomize