Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
