So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
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