im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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