I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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