I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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