he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
