Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
