I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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