Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
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