i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize