Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You pole danced in your parka.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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