Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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