I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
