When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
