I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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