recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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