She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
This is the high leading the old right now
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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