You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
