Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize