Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
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