are you still at the devil's house?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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