I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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