Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
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